Mistaken author identity and the girl with the pineapple pajamas - by N.L. Belardes
See if you can figure this one out:
Leaving Club Fred in Fresno last Friday night, Kenny and Gus of the Filthies walked over to the car I was riding in to say a tearful goodbye, “Aw man, stay a while…” Being the non-late nighter I am, I handed Kenny a pile of N.L. Belardes fliers and asked if he didn’t mind passing them out. I had never asked anyone to pass out my fliers before, but figured, here I was in Fresno and I don't get back too often... “Sure, I can do that,” he said. “I will leave them on tables and hand out a few.”
That was around 12:30 am. I toodle-de-dood home, went to bed around 3:30 am, then got a call at 6:47am. It was Kenny Mount. “Hey, after you left there was a big wreck! A car flipped, and it was total chaos!” I asked if everyone was Ok…
A few days later I received this email:
Dear NL,
Once upon a time at 1am in front of Club Fred, there was a hit-and-run involving a truck and a girl in her pajamas. I just happen to be the little girl who was in the truck, and remembered that you took pictures of the event. Partly for insurance's sake (but mostly for fun) I was hoping you could send me those shots. You wouldn't need to worry about doctoring them if they came out dark; I happen to do some photoshop myself. It would be really neat if I could get hold of those, though.
I'd love if you emailed me back
What was this? A pajama-wearing girl and a car wreck? And someone taking pictures? Wasn’t me I swear. There’s more as I gave a very academic reply:
OK...why were you at a bar in your pajamas?? Oh wait, maybe someone at the bar crashed into you? I am so confused. Were they jammies with the feet? How embarrassing, you crashed in your scooby dooos....
NB
The girl’s response:
Hahah.
No no, I wasn't at Club Fred, I was driving past it. At 1am, it's not that odd to be in your jammies. And no, they weren't footies, they have pineapples on them. And I'm sorry for causing you all this trouble. But oddly, at the crash there was a guy taking pictures of it. He gave me a little flier for your site and told me he'd post the pictures in a couple days. But I guess it wasn't you. Maybe it was an advertising technique. I didn't mean to cause any confusion, Sorry again.
What’s this, a guy handing out fliers? Was he saying he was me? Wait a minute. Was this Kenny Filthy at the scene of the wreck plugging good old N.L. Belardes in the most shameful way possible? How filthy! Now this is getting good because I soon got the full scoop from a rather cool pineapple pajama-wearing kid who had this to say:
Around midnight, I was getting myself situated to drive to my English teacher's house to turn in a paper (which she gracefully allows on the night of huge assignments). Around one in the morning, I was heading up Van Ness at about 35 mph when a drunk driver came out of the Club Fred parking lot. She hit me on the front of the passenger side rolled the truck onto the driver's side, sliding the vehicle along the pavement on the window of the cab and the truck bed. I'm not sure there's any reason the glass didn't break except for the grace of God. Coincidentally because was in front of a night club that had several people standing outside when this happened, they ran to my truck before it had even stopped moving. It was a funny sensation to be pulled up out of the passenger side window in order to get out of the glass box my truck had become. And I think it was equally funny to all the people there that the only thing I was shaken up about was how cold it was outside; and I, without a jacket. The point of this is simply -- these people who literally rescued me from my truck, I cannot overstate how wonderful they were. In every sense, they were courteous, helpful, sincere, positive, generally and specifically living blessings to me. After this, the girl who hit me approached me with a hug, asking if I was alright. I answered honestly, that there wasn't a single scratch on my body. Someone else asked if either of us had been drinking, she answered yes. I answered that I was 18 and on my way to turn in homework. The intoxicated lady went to move her car out of the middle of the road, and immediately bolted. Meaning, took off. Meaning, hit and run. Meaning: Felony. After this the police soon arrived. To shorten the story some, I couldn't wake my parents up to come get me so I called my boyfriend. Before he arrived, two stooges discovered that the drunk felon had managed to leave her torn off license plate in the middle of the road before fleeing the scene. A tow truck came and took away my poor little truck (named the Gipper) soon thereafter. I have yet to find out if it will be declared totalled. I stand in hope that it will survive, needing only body repairs, remembering that Reagan did survive an assassination attempt.
Do these things only happen in my life? Now I can’t be two places at once, and it looks like this girl was saved by some kind of angel who happened to be hovering over Club Fred; anyway, how’s that for a mystery story… and I still haven't asked Kenny if that was him being so shameful...
Leaving Club Fred in Fresno last Friday night, Kenny and Gus of the Filthies walked over to the car I was riding in to say a tearful goodbye, “Aw man, stay a while…” Being the non-late nighter I am, I handed Kenny a pile of N.L. Belardes fliers and asked if he didn’t mind passing them out. I had never asked anyone to pass out my fliers before, but figured, here I was in Fresno and I don't get back too often... “Sure, I can do that,” he said. “I will leave them on tables and hand out a few.”
That was around 12:30 am. I toodle-de-dood home, went to bed around 3:30 am, then got a call at 6:47am. It was Kenny Mount. “Hey, after you left there was a big wreck! A car flipped, and it was total chaos!” I asked if everyone was Ok…
A few days later I received this email:
Dear NL,
Once upon a time at 1am in front of Club Fred, there was a hit-and-run involving a truck and a girl in her pajamas. I just happen to be the little girl who was in the truck, and remembered that you took pictures of the event. Partly for insurance's sake (but mostly for fun) I was hoping you could send me those shots. You wouldn't need to worry about doctoring them if they came out dark; I happen to do some photoshop myself. It would be really neat if I could get hold of those, though.
I'd love if you emailed me back
What was this? A pajama-wearing girl and a car wreck? And someone taking pictures? Wasn’t me I swear. There’s more as I gave a very academic reply:
OK...why were you at a bar in your pajamas?? Oh wait, maybe someone at the bar crashed into you? I am so confused. Were they jammies with the feet? How embarrassing, you crashed in your scooby dooos....
NB
The girl’s response:
Hahah.
No no, I wasn't at Club Fred, I was driving past it. At 1am, it's not that odd to be in your jammies. And no, they weren't footies, they have pineapples on them. And I'm sorry for causing you all this trouble. But oddly, at the crash there was a guy taking pictures of it. He gave me a little flier for your site and told me he'd post the pictures in a couple days. But I guess it wasn't you. Maybe it was an advertising technique. I didn't mean to cause any confusion, Sorry again.
What’s this, a guy handing out fliers? Was he saying he was me? Wait a minute. Was this Kenny Filthy at the scene of the wreck plugging good old N.L. Belardes in the most shameful way possible? How filthy! Now this is getting good because I soon got the full scoop from a rather cool pineapple pajama-wearing kid who had this to say:
Around midnight, I was getting myself situated to drive to my English teacher's house to turn in a paper (which she gracefully allows on the night of huge assignments). Around one in the morning, I was heading up Van Ness at about 35 mph when a drunk driver came out of the Club Fred parking lot. She hit me on the front of the passenger side rolled the truck onto the driver's side, sliding the vehicle along the pavement on the window of the cab and the truck bed. I'm not sure there's any reason the glass didn't break except for the grace of God. Coincidentally because was in front of a night club that had several people standing outside when this happened, they ran to my truck before it had even stopped moving. It was a funny sensation to be pulled up out of the passenger side window in order to get out of the glass box my truck had become. And I think it was equally funny to all the people there that the only thing I was shaken up about was how cold it was outside; and I, without a jacket. The point of this is simply -- these people who literally rescued me from my truck, I cannot overstate how wonderful they were. In every sense, they were courteous, helpful, sincere, positive, generally and specifically living blessings to me. After this, the girl who hit me approached me with a hug, asking if I was alright. I answered honestly, that there wasn't a single scratch on my body. Someone else asked if either of us had been drinking, she answered yes. I answered that I was 18 and on my way to turn in homework. The intoxicated lady went to move her car out of the middle of the road, and immediately bolted. Meaning, took off. Meaning, hit and run. Meaning: Felony. After this the police soon arrived. To shorten the story some, I couldn't wake my parents up to come get me so I called my boyfriend. Before he arrived, two stooges discovered that the drunk felon had managed to leave her torn off license plate in the middle of the road before fleeing the scene. A tow truck came and took away my poor little truck (named the Gipper) soon thereafter. I have yet to find out if it will be declared totalled. I stand in hope that it will survive, needing only body repairs, remembering that Reagan did survive an assassination attempt.
Do these things only happen in my life? Now I can’t be two places at once, and it looks like this girl was saved by some kind of angel who happened to be hovering over Club Fred; anyway, how’s that for a mystery story… and I still haven't asked Kenny if that was him being so shameful...
This entry was posted by N.L. Belardes, on
Friday, April 22, 2005.
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