N.L.’s top ten locally made Xmas gifts under $20 to get your pals - By N.L. Belardes
Now this is a fine selection of Bakersfield made products, all under 20 clams. Sure I put mine as the top two. Who wouldn't? Just kidding. These aren't in any particular order and are all a great buy. If you forget where to find this blog entry, just go to my podcast and blog page and click on the monkey. Have fun:
1. Book: ‘Lords: Part One’ – if you’re from Bakersfield and you know how to read then get yourself a copy… great creepy reading… the story takes place in winter. Go read it now before the fog rolls in… Buy here from Borders/Amazon and leave a review. Or go buy online from noveltown. Or just go to Russos, Borders, or Gigantic Vintage.
2. CD: ‘Growing Up Fighting’ (arrives 1st week after Xmas for a great belated gift to get in the mail during New Year’s week) – It’s not really about fighting but about ice hockey, rebelliousness and fun wintertime camaraderie. Get it. This is going to be a local year ‘round classic just like those old Cultivation CDs. Buy Here.
3. CD: The Dalloways ‘Penalty Crusade’ – an incredible local California Brit Pop/Dream pop CD. Almost sounds like you should be drinking eggnog and chillin’ when you pop this one in… Buy Here.
4. CD: Stereotactic ‘The Dawning’ – Check out my recent review. It’s a refreshing optimistic peek at life through hardcore rock… great for the Xmas spirit and getting over break-ups. Buy Here.
5. CD: Calico Sunset ‘Deep Deep Paranoia’ – Techno 80s revival fun. Great for holiday energy…open your stockings to this one—might make your presents better... Buy Here.
6. CD: Throatshot – You can buy their new e.p. over in the mall at No Fear. I haven’t got it yet but you can expect me to in the coming days so I can have my own copy of Ego Agenda. This would go in the Nightmare Before Christmas category. Buy at No Fear in the Valley Plaza. Or send the boys a message that you want one.
7. CD: Near Miss Mallet ‘Telephone to Girl in Glass Bathtub’. I haven’t reviewed it yet, but since Danielle Belton hates it, must be worth listening to. Buy Here.
8. Book: The Blimperwhirls - Unfortunately, Lostocean pulled out of my fun Christmas list. I don't normally push my Children's story available through iUniverse, The Blimperwhirls. But then, why not? It is a great little holiday treat. Kids dig it.
Here's an excerpt:
It really was ‘The Imp of Christmas Doubt’, this little toy creature that suddenly squirmed from the startled elf’s grasp, only to turn into ash the entire peppermint buggy where the elf sat, three nearby peppermint light poles, and an entire Christmas tree of peppermint candy-shaped lights. After dancing in victory, it then wandered its way down Candy Cane lane, where, after sniffing a sudden waft of peppermint air, it disappeared into a bank of snow and snuck its way into the hollows of tunnels beneath Santa’s village.
There it went, into the dark and the cavernous recesses beneath several of Santa’s toy factories. If ever there could be darkness at the North Pole, this strange toy found the very pit of despair. And why? Because from such darkness there emanated a strong peppermint odor that the imp, in its strange purpose of destroying peppermint candies, wondered about such fragrant origins. It wandered dark passageways, squeezed between the icy webs of snow spiders, and passed through a set of iron bars built long ago to prevent merry elves from wandering into anything dark and foreboding beneath the village. You might wonder what kinds of sounds there were other than the pitter-patter of little devilish toy feet? For one, there were the squeaky sounds of water that didn’t quite know whether to be frozen or not. From ice to liquid, and liquid to ice, water went wheezing in these depths; little vermin which ate spider webs like candy peered from dark holes and made muffled noises; it seemed the very bricks and wood beams of these passages made lonely creaking sounds that typically were only heard in empty rooms and old houses late at night. And the strangest sounds of all could be heard in a long brick-layered corridor, where old toys, not quite able to move their broken parts, hung on the walls like ghosts, and made sounds much like a wraith would make just before saying, “Boo.” Quieted for a moment, the imp found a lonely bench near the hanging toys. It was a seat that was so tiny that it seemed made just for the imp’s solitude. The bench itself was perched on a ledge overlooking a chasm, where far below there was a twinkling and winking as if the very universe had been turned upside-down; it seemed to the imp as if the starry night-time sky had been formed as a very deep chasm, instead of as a very high and untouchable place. It was from far below that this peppermint scent originated. However, on this slightly dusty bench, this strange devilish toy looked away from the chasm and instead, pondered the meaning of Christmas. It doubted itself, magic, and where even it came from. “I am the Imp of Christmas Doubt. I have a purpose,” it said to no one but itself. “I have to do something about this purpose. But what about my batteries?” it said, stretching its impish red arms. “I wonder if they will work for very long, especially if I continue to where I had wanted to go, so far below?” This was the Imp of Christmas Doubt for goodness sake. It was full of self-wonder and forever filled with self-doubt, and without any candy canes there beneath the earth, the imp, though previously hungry on the trail of the peppermint scent, became filled with ever more doubtful thoughts, even as it looked to the twinkling lights from far below, which perhaps were in themselves great peppermint stars.
buy now...
or,
browse more of the book...
9. T-Shirt: ‘Scrooge’s Art Bazaar’ shirt from the Empty Space. Supports the fine arts and under $99 Art Bazaa. Scrooge is a fun holiday shirt to wear to any holiday event. Contact The Empty Space Theatre, or send A.S. Ashley a message that you want a dozen. You can see the image on his myspace page.
10. Hockey: Bakersfield Condor games are fun and rowdy. Bundle up and take a friend to a game for a nice present. There are 4 games in December… all against teams I love to hate. December 31st is the next band night. You can get cool discount tickets to see the Condors and Fatt Cat and the Vonzippers. By the way, the Condors are UNDEFEATED on hockey song nights. Get discount tickets here.
1. Book: ‘Lords: Part One’ – if you’re from Bakersfield and you know how to read then get yourself a copy… great creepy reading… the story takes place in winter. Go read it now before the fog rolls in… Buy here from Borders/Amazon and leave a review. Or go buy online from noveltown. Or just go to Russos, Borders, or Gigantic Vintage.
2. CD: ‘Growing Up Fighting’ (arrives 1st week after Xmas for a great belated gift to get in the mail during New Year’s week) – It’s not really about fighting but about ice hockey, rebelliousness and fun wintertime camaraderie. Get it. This is going to be a local year ‘round classic just like those old Cultivation CDs. Buy Here.
3. CD: The Dalloways ‘Penalty Crusade’ – an incredible local California Brit Pop/Dream pop CD. Almost sounds like you should be drinking eggnog and chillin’ when you pop this one in… Buy Here.
4. CD: Stereotactic ‘The Dawning’ – Check out my recent review. It’s a refreshing optimistic peek at life through hardcore rock… great for the Xmas spirit and getting over break-ups. Buy Here.
5. CD: Calico Sunset ‘Deep Deep Paranoia’ – Techno 80s revival fun. Great for holiday energy…open your stockings to this one—might make your presents better... Buy Here.
6. CD: Throatshot – You can buy their new e.p. over in the mall at No Fear. I haven’t got it yet but you can expect me to in the coming days so I can have my own copy of Ego Agenda. This would go in the Nightmare Before Christmas category. Buy at No Fear in the Valley Plaza. Or send the boys a message that you want one.
7. CD: Near Miss Mallet ‘Telephone to Girl in Glass Bathtub’. I haven’t reviewed it yet, but since Danielle Belton hates it, must be worth listening to. Buy Here.
8. Book: The Blimperwhirls - Unfortunately, Lostocean pulled out of my fun Christmas list. I don't normally push my Children's story available through iUniverse, The Blimperwhirls. But then, why not? It is a great little holiday treat. Kids dig it.
Here's an excerpt:
It really was ‘The Imp of Christmas Doubt’, this little toy creature that suddenly squirmed from the startled elf’s grasp, only to turn into ash the entire peppermint buggy where the elf sat, three nearby peppermint light poles, and an entire Christmas tree of peppermint candy-shaped lights. After dancing in victory, it then wandered its way down Candy Cane lane, where, after sniffing a sudden waft of peppermint air, it disappeared into a bank of snow and snuck its way into the hollows of tunnels beneath Santa’s village.
There it went, into the dark and the cavernous recesses beneath several of Santa’s toy factories. If ever there could be darkness at the North Pole, this strange toy found the very pit of despair. And why? Because from such darkness there emanated a strong peppermint odor that the imp, in its strange purpose of destroying peppermint candies, wondered about such fragrant origins. It wandered dark passageways, squeezed between the icy webs of snow spiders, and passed through a set of iron bars built long ago to prevent merry elves from wandering into anything dark and foreboding beneath the village. You might wonder what kinds of sounds there were other than the pitter-patter of little devilish toy feet? For one, there were the squeaky sounds of water that didn’t quite know whether to be frozen or not. From ice to liquid, and liquid to ice, water went wheezing in these depths; little vermin which ate spider webs like candy peered from dark holes and made muffled noises; it seemed the very bricks and wood beams of these passages made lonely creaking sounds that typically were only heard in empty rooms and old houses late at night. And the strangest sounds of all could be heard in a long brick-layered corridor, where old toys, not quite able to move their broken parts, hung on the walls like ghosts, and made sounds much like a wraith would make just before saying, “Boo.” Quieted for a moment, the imp found a lonely bench near the hanging toys. It was a seat that was so tiny that it seemed made just for the imp’s solitude. The bench itself was perched on a ledge overlooking a chasm, where far below there was a twinkling and winking as if the very universe had been turned upside-down; it seemed to the imp as if the starry night-time sky had been formed as a very deep chasm, instead of as a very high and untouchable place. It was from far below that this peppermint scent originated. However, on this slightly dusty bench, this strange devilish toy looked away from the chasm and instead, pondered the meaning of Christmas. It doubted itself, magic, and where even it came from. “I am the Imp of Christmas Doubt. I have a purpose,” it said to no one but itself. “I have to do something about this purpose. But what about my batteries?” it said, stretching its impish red arms. “I wonder if they will work for very long, especially if I continue to where I had wanted to go, so far below?” This was the Imp of Christmas Doubt for goodness sake. It was full of self-wonder and forever filled with self-doubt, and without any candy canes there beneath the earth, the imp, though previously hungry on the trail of the peppermint scent, became filled with ever more doubtful thoughts, even as it looked to the twinkling lights from far below, which perhaps were in themselves great peppermint stars.
buy now...
or,
browse more of the book...
9. T-Shirt: ‘Scrooge’s Art Bazaar’ shirt from the Empty Space. Supports the fine arts and under $99 Art Bazaa. Scrooge is a fun holiday shirt to wear to any holiday event. Contact The Empty Space Theatre, or send A.S. Ashley a message that you want a dozen. You can see the image on his myspace page.
10. Hockey: Bakersfield Condor games are fun and rowdy. Bundle up and take a friend to a game for a nice present. There are 4 games in December… all against teams I love to hate. December 31st is the next band night. You can get cool discount tickets to see the Condors and Fatt Cat and the Vonzippers. By the way, the Condors are UNDEFEATED on hockey song nights. Get discount tickets here.
This entry was posted by N.L. Belardes, on
Monday, December 05, 2005.
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