Top ten most boring jobs/places to work in Bakersfield - By N.L. Belardes
Honorable Mention: Bakersfield City. Let’s face it, there are a lot of boring city jobs out there folks. Just imagine them before you go to sleep at night.
10. Almost anywhere in Kern County real estate. It just can’t be exciting unless you’re the real estate agent selling million-dollar homes. Anything else and it’s just pencil pushing and contract signing. Algae-filled pools in foreclosed homes are kind of colorful though. Zzzz…
9. Golf Cart Cop. I remember seeing one of these traffic cop folks having to clean up the downtown smashed county seal after it fell in a dust storm. Not a fun job putting chalk on tires either.
8. Long John Silvers. Now that pirates are sort of out of fashion I can’t see this franchise lasting much longer in Bakersfield. Johnny Depp better make another film.
7. Bakersfield Californian. Really depends on what you’re doing. I always think reporters have cool jobs. But for people distributing newspapers. I just can’t see any inky fun in doing that. Although the old video game Paperboy was killer.
6. ProSoft Technology. Located on top floor of Washington Mutual Building in downtown Bakersfield. What can I say? Without Doug Sharratt, that company has to be about as lively as the Crystal Palace without Buck Owens favorite chicken fried steak.
5. Bill Thomas Terminal. I just can’t see screening Bako folks before they step on planes as a fun job. This isn’t LAX we’re talking about, folks. It’s a terminal in the middle of nowheresville. The Homeland Security patches are the only thing cool to look at.
4. Marketplace security cop. You ride bikes around watching kids make-out. You break up fights between boys who just made out with girls. You pick on small kids. Kinda boring. Or is it?
3. Valley Plaza Mall. There aren’t even good teen angst mall movies these days. Malls are boring places to go to unless you’re seeing a movie. They’re a great place to go to if you’re trying to hook up with drug dealers or watch their girlfriend’s sell all their hard-earned drug-dealing boyfriend's crack money. Try selling shoes at a mall. Talk about stinky feet.
2. Any Pentecostal Church. Need I say more? Some of their preachers probably have cool tattoos though. So do their secretaries come to think about it.
1. Kern County Building on Truxtun Avenue. Do you know how boring it is to even look at that building? I practically fall asleep while driving past it. I have often seen gaggles of employees walking to sandwich shops and gossiping about other workers. It’s a job requirement: must be a good gossiper, must wear a bland dress, must claw way to top of county food chain. Just ask Cubicle Dweller.
10. Almost anywhere in Kern County real estate. It just can’t be exciting unless you’re the real estate agent selling million-dollar homes. Anything else and it’s just pencil pushing and contract signing. Algae-filled pools in foreclosed homes are kind of colorful though. Zzzz…
9. Golf Cart Cop. I remember seeing one of these traffic cop folks having to clean up the downtown smashed county seal after it fell in a dust storm. Not a fun job putting chalk on tires either.
8. Long John Silvers. Now that pirates are sort of out of fashion I can’t see this franchise lasting much longer in Bakersfield. Johnny Depp better make another film.
7. Bakersfield Californian. Really depends on what you’re doing. I always think reporters have cool jobs. But for people distributing newspapers. I just can’t see any inky fun in doing that. Although the old video game Paperboy was killer.
6. ProSoft Technology. Located on top floor of Washington Mutual Building in downtown Bakersfield. What can I say? Without Doug Sharratt, that company has to be about as lively as the Crystal Palace without Buck Owens favorite chicken fried steak.
5. Bill Thomas Terminal. I just can’t see screening Bako folks before they step on planes as a fun job. This isn’t LAX we’re talking about, folks. It’s a terminal in the middle of nowheresville. The Homeland Security patches are the only thing cool to look at.
4. Marketplace security cop. You ride bikes around watching kids make-out. You break up fights between boys who just made out with girls. You pick on small kids. Kinda boring. Or is it?
3. Valley Plaza Mall. There aren’t even good teen angst mall movies these days. Malls are boring places to go to unless you’re seeing a movie. They’re a great place to go to if you’re trying to hook up with drug dealers or watch their girlfriend’s sell all their hard-earned drug-dealing boyfriend's crack money. Try selling shoes at a mall. Talk about stinky feet.
2. Any Pentecostal Church. Need I say more? Some of their preachers probably have cool tattoos though. So do their secretaries come to think about it.
1. Kern County Building on Truxtun Avenue. Do you know how boring it is to even look at that building? I practically fall asleep while driving past it. I have often seen gaggles of employees walking to sandwich shops and gossiping about other workers. It’s a job requirement: must be a good gossiper, must wear a bland dress, must claw way to top of county food chain. Just ask Cubicle Dweller.
Labels: alternative Bakersfield, employment, job list, Kern County, top ten list, worst places to work
This entry was posted by N.L. Belardes, on
Monday, August 04, 2008.
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Your list was hysterical.
I agree about Johnny Depp making another pirate movie though. ;)
you forgot the east hills mall and the auto mall... places people don't really care for or visit.
I'd say someone who has to count the rainfall totals, weighing trucks at the landfill, a local immigration official or an SUV salesperson.
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